


To Frienemies

by angelskuuipo



Series: Fic-A-Palooza 2011 [2]
Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death, Early Work, F/M, GFY, Gen, Gift Fic, No Coma!Cordy, No Jasmine, No Willow/Kennedy, Post-Chosen, The Fang Gang didn't take over W&H, post season 4 for Angel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-14
Updated: 2014-06-14
Packaged: 2018-02-04 14:55:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1783069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelskuuipo/pseuds/angelskuuipo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They each wanted to remember one of the fallen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Frienemies

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Velvetwhip (Gabrielle)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gabrielle/gifts).



> Prompt: Willow/Angel, fire escape
> 
> Written for the stupendous [](http://velvetwhip.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://velvetwhip.livejournal.com/)**velvetwhip** in honor of my 7th Writing Anniversary. I do hope you like this, sweetheart. Thanks be to Elisabeth and Snogged for the betas. Any remaining mistakes are mine.
> 
> Originally posted 2-8-11.

  
[ ](http://pics.livejournal.com/angelskuuipo/pic/000d37zb/)   


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

With the exception of Xander, who’d cut out when the music started, they were all partying like no one had been lost. As if none of the Potentials had died. As if Anya wasn’t lying under the rubble that had been Sunnydale High. As if Spike hadn’t sacrificed himself to close the Hellmouth.

Yeah, Willow was glad so many had made it out, but the party going on didn’t seem appropriate. Not right now.

Unable to take the atmosphere of celebration anymore, Willow ducked out of the Hyperion around ten and found the nearest liquor store. She bought a bottle of Jack and slowly made her way back to the hotel. Thinking about it now, she wasn’t sure they’d made the right decision to descend on Angel the way they had, but what was done was done. She was just glad he’d let them stay.

The lobby and garden were still full of newly minted slayers inhaling vast quantities of pizza and soda when she returned and Willow still wanted nothing to do with them. Though the idea of watching Dawn and Connor dance around each other (and wasn’t that the irony to end all ironies) making goo-goo eyes when they thought no one was watching had merit, that meant being around Buffy, and that wasn’t happening right now.

So she skirted the outside of the building until she found the fire escape, but the bottom rung was just out of her reach. Muttering under her breath, Willow set the brown paper bag from the store out of the way then jumped up to get a grip on the ladder. It pulled down with her weight and she grunted in satisfaction. She grabbed her purchase and started her climb.

Just after she passed the second floor window she caught a whiff of cigarette smoke and Spike’s face flashed in her mind. Tears pricked her eyes and she looked up to blink them back. That was when she saw Angel sitting up on the fourth-floor landing and he was smoking.

Butterflies started doing the rumba in her belly at the sight of her friend taking a long drag. Angel didn’t smoke, but Angelus did. Maybe drinking a toast to Spike was going to have to wait while she did the re-souling spell. _Again_. Willow scowled. She was going to superglue the damn thing on him this time.

“I’m still me, Willow,” Angel said softly, his voice carrying clearly on the night air.

Willow jumped a little, startled out of her thoughts. She looked up again and saw Angel’s face for a second in the red glow of the cigarette as he took another drag. Taking him at his word, for now, Willow finished her climb and joined him on the landing.

“Why are you out here?” she asked.

“There are a few too many people that want to slay me in my own home right now,” Angel replied dryly.

Willow winced. “Sorry about that. Not our best idea ever, but I couldn’t really think of anyplace else to go. We can leave if you want us to.”

He waved her off. “Don’t worry about it. Better them here than a hotel with regular people who might ask questions.”

Willow couldn’t really disagree, so she said nothing. Silence fell heavily between them and she wondered why she was having such a hard time thinking of something to say.

“I didn’t think you smoked,” she finally said in an effort to break the silence.

Angel shrugged. “I usually don’t.” He glanced at her then held up the cigarette and watched it intently as it burned. “Just paying a bit of tribute to one of the fallen,” he said after a few more moments of quiet. “It seemed rather appropriate.”

Willow’s breath hitched and she laughed softly. Angel looked at her and she pulled the bottle of Jack Daniel’s out of the paper bag. “That was my plan, too,” she offered.

Angel’s grin was fleeting, but it was real. He flicked the remains of his cigarette over the railing then held out his hand. Willow gave him the bottle and he opened it, immediately passing it back to her. She lifted it up in a toast and said, “To Spike, the most irritating and devoted frienemy one could ever ask for.” She took a drink, wrinkling her nose and shuddering as she swallowed.

Not her favorite thing ever, but she was going to do this, damn it. Someone needed to remember the blond menace and it sure as heck didn’t look like it was going to be Buffy. Her friend was acting like Spike never existed, like he hadn’t just sacrificed himself to save the world, and that didn’t make any sense to Willow. She had thought the two of them had finally come to some sort of understanding. There had seemed to be a peace between them before they entered the Hellmouth. Willow shook her head. Too many thoughts and she was just plain too tired to try and talk to Buffy right now.

Angel took the bottle, seemingly oblivious to Willow’s inner-musings, and murmured, “To Spike,” as he took a drink.

He passed the bottle back to her and she took another drink. This one went down a little easier. They went on like that, passing the bottle back and forth for a while, each lost in their own head until the bottle was empty. The night had taken on an almost dream-like quality.

“Buffy didn’t even mention him,” Angel said out of the blue. Maybe not so oblivious then. “Faith told me what he did.”

Willow blinked at him. “I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye.” She frowned. “No, that’s not true. I didn’t take the time. It was beyond naive to think we’d all make it out, but I don’t think any of us really took the time to say our farewells to everyone.” She looked up at Angel. “Does that make me a bad person?”

Angel draped his arm over her shoulders and pulled her into his side. He tenderly kissed the top of her head and said, “No. It doesn’t make you a bad person, Willow. It means you’re human.” He laughed a little harshly. “The last thing I did when I saw him was insult him. Seems to be the story of our unlife.” She made a sound of encouragement and Angel continued. “I…loved him and hated him. He was everything I could never be.”

Willow tilted her head up to say…something. She didn’t really know what, but hoped whatever came out of her mouth would be comforting. All thoughts of speaking derailed, though, because as she looked up Angel looked down and their lips met accidentally. Instead of pulling back, Willow pressed her lips a little firmer against his, and Angel took that as assent to deepen the kiss.

And Willow let him. Maybe because she was on her way to being drunk, maybe it was because they both had regrets concerning Spike, or maybe it was because it just felt good and it had been a long while since she’d kissed anyone. She’d worry about the reasons later.

Angel’s tongue teased her mouth open and Willow let him in. She tasted the cigarettes he’d been smoking and then she was remembering the few times Spike had kissed her that she had never told anyone about: in the factory with Xander lying unconscious a few feet away; when he broke into her dorm room after escaping the Initiative; that night she found him crying over Joyce’s grave; after she refused to kill him when she found him in the new high school’s basement.

Four kisses. Four opportunities for something more and four opportunities lost.

Even as she responded to Angel’s kiss, silent tears rolled down Willow’s cheeks. He finally gentled the kiss, breaking it into smaller nips and sips, until he pulled away completely.

Willow slowly opened her eyes to see him studying her. She reached up to wipe the tears away, but Angel beat her to it. His thumb was calloused, a little rough, but the touch felt good against Willow’s skin.

“Should I apologize?” Angel asked after several moments of silence.

Willow shook her head. “No. No, I think that kiss was actually the perfect way for me to remember him.” He raised his eyebrows in curiosity and she shrugged, smiling faintly. “It fits the pattern.”

Angel blinked at her. “What does that mean?”

Willow grinned, feeling lighter than she had in a while. She turned in Angel’s embrace and made herself comfortable with her head against his shoulder. His arms felt natural and right wrapped around her. She had no idea what the morning would bring or where they were all going to go from here, but it didn’t matter. Life was a series of moments and this one was important.

“Let me tell you a story,” she began.

-30-


End file.
